Kristiana = Awesome

Today is Kristiana's 14th birthday and I thought I would, if you will allow me (and even if you don't), dedicate a post entirely to her. I should probably have cleared it with her but as long as I leave out embarrassing stories about her I should be ok...

So anyway when she was a baby she destroyed a diaper, an outfit, and most of a stroller with what has come to be known as the nuclear bomb of baby outputs! I mean it registered on the Richter scale! They diverted airplanes to avoid the west coast. The Alameda County Fair emergency response team earned their money that day!

For those of you keeping score, I will pay for that and she may even force me to edit this. Read fast!

Sylvia and I were so excited to find out we (well she) was pregnant. I still have the penny I found walking to the store to buy our first pregnancy test. It was heads up if anyone is interested in that sort of thing. We came home and Sylvia "did her thing" and we waited. Being the ever delicate and sensitive husband that I am, I announced to anyone who would listen, "Sylvia peed on a stick and it turned pink!"

So now the score is Sylvia - 1, Kristiana - 1, Jeff - 0. This may be a good time to inquire about rooms for rent.

We were thrilled. I was mostly petrified and counting on Sylvia's vast experience working in a nursery to get me through. 9 months later in the delivery room the doctors told us that they were not going to have her cry right away because they needed to clear her mouth and throat. As soon as she arrived she announced her strong-willedness with authority as she screamed like I had stuck her with a pin. (OK, I had a pin but I swear I didn't come anywhere near her!) She was beautiful, and perfect, and had the cutest ears in the known universe. It sounds weird but they were both equally wrinkled and looked like there were tiny little butterflies on the sides of her head.

And...she liked me. That sounds like a "gimme" but when I said I was petrified to become a father it was not without cause. I felt like I was still a child having a child even though I was (... let's see carry the four... minus... to the third power..) older than average when we had her. I also had never held a baby that hadn't cried...ever! The only thing that kept me from retreating to a fatherless cave was something my cousin Bev told me as I held her crying baby girl, Rachel. She said, "Don't worry. It's different with your own child." Truer words were never spoken. It was different. I was even able to turn her crying into quiet! My method of balancing her over my shoulder caused the nurses to have stern words with me, but hey, I was in heaven.

For three solid months if her eyes were open she was screaming. The only things that would quiet her down was to be carried around in backpack or for me to sing White Christmas at the top of my lungs...bear in mind, her birthday is now! May! This little sweet screamer grew to be one smart cookie. She was amazing. She was three when the chicken nugget incident happened. She asked us if she could be done eating and, being the smart alec I am, I asked her how many she had eaten. She looked at her little tray and said, "I don't know. How many did I start with?"
"Five."
"Then I ate three. Can I be done?"
That fast. And she was right! I think I walked around for an hour with my jaw hanging open. She revisited this giftedness when she was in the first grade. She announced that she wanted me to take her to see the first Harry Potter movie. I, smart alec again, told her that I would as soon as she read the book by herself. She sat her determined little bottom down and read that book cover to cover...and understood it! It was a good movie though.

This wonderful, cute, beautiful, smart, little girl has turned into someone whose heart matches all of that and more. Unlike her dad, there isn't a baby born that won't seek her out and have a blast doing it. She loves to take care of the wee ones. As we are a full year into teenagerdom I am looking forward to many more wonderful milestones to come. It is exciting to see her grow into the great person she is today and I am so hopeful about the wonderful things to come...although I am not terribly anxious to experience driving.

I realize that I skipped from baby to now rather quickly. Indulge me, I need to be able to write more about her later...and I have already been told that I "have a lot of words" in my blog (that I shouldn't have since I am so old).

Happy Birthday Sweetheart!