"Surely, you can't be serious!"

Did you ever notice how some lines from movies become part of the cultural identity? Me neither. But, I have determined, after moments of extensive and grueling research, that there are three types of people. People who like to quote lines from movies. People who do not care about lines from movies. And people who do not care about lines from movies but still love the people who do like to quote lines from movies without quite understanding what the big deal is. I am planted solidly in the first group. Lucky for me, Sylvia, my wife, is an eye-rolling member of the third group.

There is a common bond among people who are able to rattle off rapid-fire movie quotes. If you can do it at just the right time and with just the right audience the result can be sublime. Time slows down, cheers from adoring fans can be heard, (picture Ralphie from A Christmas Story getting his A+++ on his theme) and your standing among the "quoters" moves up a notch. If however you choose too obscure a quote or miss the tone of the conversation, you are demoted to the rank of newbie and forced to work your way back up starting at (shudder) "Frankly Scarlett, I don't give a damn." or "Houston, we've had a problem."

Knowing your audience is a big part of the equation. There are some perennial golden-oldie favorites that are widely accepted and understood: "Surely, you can't be serious." is one. "Who ya gonna call?" another. "Cinderella story... It's in the hole!" yet another. It is good to have a solid foundation in the classics.

There are some people who will always laugh at certain quotes, and it is always good to know those if you want to brighten someone's day. I have a buddy, Craig, who is a sucker for a certain quote and is always good for a laugh whenever I say it. It is amazing how many times I can work it into a conversation whenever I talk to him. I am not going to tell it...he needs to make a living and there may some among the twos of people who are reading this who may have nefarious plans of world domination starting with causing Craig to laugh uncontrollably. And he has a family to support after all. Leave the poor guy alone.

Still there are tests to see if you are in the presence of a ranking member of the quote club. When you say, "Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking." and it is followed by "Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue." you are in the presence of a quoter. If you are met by a courteous smile and a the laughter equivalent of a golf clap, well then, "move along. Nothing to see here." I am working my way up the ranking ladder and am fairly competetive so when someone fires a quote at me, time slows down, someone in my head whistles the gonna-be-a-gunfight tune from any Clint Eastwood western, tumbleweeds roll between us, and I fire back a line from the same movie. Game, set, match! I blow the smoke from the end of my finger gun and walk slowly off into the sunset. Ca-ching Ca-ching Ca-ching (which is a bit awkward when I am supposed to be doing something important...and I don't wear spurs.)

My late brother and I could entertain ourselves for hours doing this. In fact I still have some of his movie quotes saved as texts on my phone. He would think it was a hoot that I was trying to make millions (because that is the ultimate goal of writing a blog) by telling about movie quotes. He was such a high ranking member of the quote club I very seriously considered standing up at his memorial service and saying a line from City Slickers, "Lord, we give you Danny. Try not to piss him off."

Until next time, "It's scientific experiments for the lot of you."