I Smell Pretty...Oh So Pretty...

Yes, this lovely morning I am feeling somewhat festive. More alert. Ready to, perhaps, ride a white horse on the beach in slow motion. The cause? Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

The following should be read in your best imaginary TV announcer's voice...you know, the voice at the end of commercials that state use of this product may result in death and dismemberment.

The following post, while not being explicit may inadvertently cause trauma. The writers of this silliness wish to inform you that by continuing to read you are agreeing to the terms of this disclaimer and you shall hold harmless all parties involved. Furthermore, should you get a mental image that you find disturbing, you realize that they have not yet invented "mental floss" and you could be stuck with said image like someone who comes back from Disneyland is stuck with It's a Small World for quite some time.

Still here? Let's venture on.

So I am in the shower this morning... getting ready to squeeze a little "Manly Body Wash" onto my imported European scrunchy thingy and the most I can get is...sssssspt sssssspt. Curses, foiled again! Whoever said that you should use liquid soap in the size of a coin didn't account for the fact that my children would envision the large, carved, stone coins of Easter Island (They are not from there, nor would a 7 foot diameter coin fit into our shower...creative license. Sue me.) Goodness knows why but I am now faced with the choice between smelling like tangerine infused with white ginger, and smelling...period.

So now I smell like a life saver. Were I still in junior high, I would get beaten up for sure. I might be worried except that I am going to watch a black belt test today and they are trained to watch out for the weak and pitiful. If I was going to a super model convention I would be terrified! I mean a life saver? That probably represents food intake for the entire year! I would be toast (or at least served on toast...low carb of course).

So as I wish my friends who are taking the test luck, I ask that you wish me luck...I would hate to run into someone from junior high...or a super model!