I just looked through the writing I had done for my college creative writing class thinking I would be able to grab something that was written and then pass it off as new. (kidding) Trouble is, it's a collection of assignments and the short stories and such are still out there in Neverland. I can remember three stories vividly...and would love to get my hands on them to work them into a screenplay and make bazillions of dollars...but I don't know where they are. What I did find, however, was a group of the teacher's comments on the writing I've done. One of them turned out to be prophetic. It said, "You do really well with things (subjects) that, to us, seem trivial."
Boy, if that doesn't sum up this blog in a sentence! Trust me, I am not saying that I am doing really well at anything...but I do have a lot of fun talking about trivial things! The time I hit the keys on the keyboard with my eyes shut, and wrote a post about that. That time I spent eight paragraphs talking about some lady's tattoo. How about when I talked about my superpower...the ability to make women have to pee from laughing. If this isn't trivial...I don't know what is. Much like the beginning of Huck Finn...anyone trying to assign importance to this blog will be examined. Anyone seeking deeper relevance will be sedated. That's just really not what I am going for. And unlike Mr. Twain...I mean it! I did just recently have someone tell me that they didn't always agree with everything I wrote in the blog, but they enjoyed it. Curious. I don't think I have held too many positions that were open to anything but ridicule. Oh well, it is also very possible that my memory is fading quickly...which is why I'd better get started on today's topic. My teacher, and her guiding me toward subjects trivial, would be very proud of today...
I've never seen a family that didn't have them. We all have one in our family. Mine is fairly secure. The kids' used to be open to variety but that time has passed. Last but not least, fear not...Sylvia has one too. Regular visitors have them when they come over. My nieces just claimed theirs when they were here for Christmas. It's funny though, even though they want them when they are here, no one has ever taken theirs home when they leave.
What on Earth am I talking about? Spots.
This season, and the groups of people who come to the house, have me thinking about spots. Not dalmatians, not dice, not the area on the rug visited by friends with plates of food and questionable balance or even puppies and their even more questionable bladders. No, I am talking about places at the table. When you read that you immediately thought of your spot. I'm not judging. Merely pointing out an observation. We had quite a few people over for a meal this year and the one thing that happened, every time, when we were almost ready to sit down was for people to stand around the table and wonder where they were going to sit.
The conversation inevitably turned to "spots" and "where do you normally sit?" At this time it is really difficult to be both OCD and polite at the same time. Part of me wants people to feel comfortable so I always say, "Sit anywhere! We're not formal." Another, darker side of me needs to be restrained because it is mumbling, "Don't sit there. Don't sit there. Don't sit there." That is when it is nice to have kids. They always add the instructions for the music-less musical chairs. Dad sits there. Mom sits there. We sit here and there. Depending on how many people and how many sections are added to the table, the options for where to sit dwindle with each passing second.
There's always someone (me) who is ready to offer specific advice about where to sit. Depending on who the guest is, I will offer my own brand of smart aleckness to answer the "where should I sit dilemma." "On Your Bottom!" is a perennial favorite in my family. I suppose the only time that would be helpful is if we had visitors from Ork (if you are old enough to remember the show then you hopefully will remember the unusual way that Mork sat down...I am nothing if not exceptionally current. Hey! Do you remember the episode of Three's Company where they had the misunderstanding about something!? Funny)
OK, so I have a confession to make now. I have been sitting (no pun intended...well maybe a little) on this particular piece of writing for a while. I keep coming back to it and don't feel right to start another until this one is ended. (pun) I don't want to leave a post behind. (pun) This subject has been a pain in the...well you know what I mean. I'm going to sign off. Start a new topic and hopefully don't leave you sitting on the edge of your seat.
SPOTS!?! It seemed like such a good idea at the time.
Boy, if that doesn't sum up this blog in a sentence! Trust me, I am not saying that I am doing really well at anything...but I do have a lot of fun talking about trivial things! The time I hit the keys on the keyboard with my eyes shut, and wrote a post about that. That time I spent eight paragraphs talking about some lady's tattoo. How about when I talked about my superpower...the ability to make women have to pee from laughing. If this isn't trivial...I don't know what is. Much like the beginning of Huck Finn...anyone trying to assign importance to this blog will be examined. Anyone seeking deeper relevance will be sedated. That's just really not what I am going for. And unlike Mr. Twain...I mean it! I did just recently have someone tell me that they didn't always agree with everything I wrote in the blog, but they enjoyed it. Curious. I don't think I have held too many positions that were open to anything but ridicule. Oh well, it is also very possible that my memory is fading quickly...which is why I'd better get started on today's topic. My teacher, and her guiding me toward subjects trivial, would be very proud of today...
I've never seen a family that didn't have them. We all have one in our family. Mine is fairly secure. The kids' used to be open to variety but that time has passed. Last but not least, fear not...Sylvia has one too. Regular visitors have them when they come over. My nieces just claimed theirs when they were here for Christmas. It's funny though, even though they want them when they are here, no one has ever taken theirs home when they leave.
What on Earth am I talking about? Spots.
This season, and the groups of people who come to the house, have me thinking about spots. Not dalmatians, not dice, not the area on the rug visited by friends with plates of food and questionable balance or even puppies and their even more questionable bladders. No, I am talking about places at the table. When you read that you immediately thought of your spot. I'm not judging. Merely pointing out an observation. We had quite a few people over for a meal this year and the one thing that happened, every time, when we were almost ready to sit down was for people to stand around the table and wonder where they were going to sit.
The conversation inevitably turned to "spots" and "where do you normally sit?" At this time it is really difficult to be both OCD and polite at the same time. Part of me wants people to feel comfortable so I always say, "Sit anywhere! We're not formal." Another, darker side of me needs to be restrained because it is mumbling, "Don't sit there. Don't sit there. Don't sit there." That is when it is nice to have kids. They always add the instructions for the music-less musical chairs. Dad sits there. Mom sits there. We sit here and there. Depending on how many people and how many sections are added to the table, the options for where to sit dwindle with each passing second.
There's always someone (me) who is ready to offer specific advice about where to sit. Depending on who the guest is, I will offer my own brand of smart aleckness to answer the "where should I sit dilemma." "On Your Bottom!" is a perennial favorite in my family. I suppose the only time that would be helpful is if we had visitors from Ork (if you are old enough to remember the show then you hopefully will remember the unusual way that Mork sat down...I am nothing if not exceptionally current. Hey! Do you remember the episode of Three's Company where they had the misunderstanding about something!? Funny)
OK, so I have a confession to make now. I have been sitting (no pun intended...well maybe a little) on this particular piece of writing for a while. I keep coming back to it and don't feel right to start another until this one is ended. (pun) I don't want to leave a post behind. (pun) This subject has been a pain in the...well you know what I mean. I'm going to sign off. Start a new topic and hopefully don't leave you sitting on the edge of your seat.
SPOTS!?! It seemed like such a good idea at the time.
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